Change.

What do you do when you have it all? Truth is, I don’t have it all….yet. So, I don’t know the answer, and therein lies my problem.

Yesterday I went live on FB and IG talking about the change cycle. Like trees, we often go dormant as we rest and plan, then we plant seeds and nourish ideas, next we spend time enjoying the fruits of our labor before there comes a time when things no longer serves us and we’re called to let go, possibly going dormant again to rest and plan. 

As an avid visionary, I have zero problem letting go, resting and planning, or planting seeds. Where I get stuck is allowing myself to sit in this season of enough. Enjoying the fruits of my labor. Laughing. Playing. Traveling.

The lie I’ve been telling myself is that enjoying what I have isn’t “productive” and there’s always more I can be doing.

True, I can always plant more seeds. I can always dream more. Do more. Be more. But there something nice about just being. Right here. In this moment. Acknowledging how far I’ve come rather than looking at far I still have to go.

Have you heard of the hero’s journey? In a broad sense, a hero goes on a journey, encounters a crisis, wins a victory and comes home transformed.

Think through most novels or rom-coms, or in my case, Hallmark movies. There’s always a sticky middle where things don’t quite look like they’ll work out. The person has to work harder, overcome obstacles, or endure great loss before coming out the other side. 

What I’ve discovered through my own awareness is that I’ve bought into the notion of the hero’s journey.

When I’m in a season like now, where I’ve come so far and want to enjoy this space for a bit, it doesn’t feel hard enough. I’m not struggling. The obstacles aren’t insurmountable, and I’ve not overwhelmed so something must be wrong. Right?

It’s during these seasons, I often self sabotage. I begin to look for obstacles, or better yet, create them through procrastination, picking a fight, miscommunication that could have been avoided, or any other number of ways. 

That’s unhealthy, friends. I know it, and yet I struggle to accept it at times. I’m always a work in progress. 

So how does one overcome this concept of not enough and always striving for more?

For me, it’s books on intentional living. Being around family. Friends who ask the hard questions. Yoga and stillness. Turtle steps - they’re my fave. My coach. Yes, even the coach has a coach to help with her blindspots.

And most importantly, gratitude. Cultivating a gratitude practice allows me to see how much abundance is in my life and how far I’ve come, hence the love + gratitude journal. 

Here’s the thing - my future is so bright. I’m blazing a trail that’s full of life, and coaching, and motivation and women and books and journals and conferences and travel - OH MY! It’s all there in my future. I can see it as vividly as I feel it in my bones. And yet, I know it can wait.

Divine timing, friends. 

I’d love to know what suggestions you have for me.

How do you stay present and enjoy right now while simultaneously planting seeds and working toward your goals?