Love.

Love is the defense against the dark arts.
- Martha Beck

Sitting on my desk, next to my laptop, is a bent spoon. I remember the day I was taught to bend spoons. It was early November 2018, and I was freezing my tail off in a crowded conference room in San Luis Obispo as I listened to my mentor, Martha Beck, talk about the power of love. 

“Pick up your spoons and try to bend it in half,” she instructed the crowd. 

We’d each been given a spoon from the hotel’s finest cutlery. It was thick. Solid. Weighty in my hands. I can recall the sting as the metal dug into my palms. The spoon didn’t budge. 

After a few moments of trying, Martha encouraged us to simply hold the spoon, close our eyes and focus on our breath. 

She instructed us to recall a happy memory, one that’s full of love. Maybe the day your child was born or your wedding day. Maybe a place you love to travel or a certain spot in nature that brings peace. 

For me, I went to the mountain top in Bali. The summit of Mount Batur on the day I overcame the odds and did something I thought I couldn’t  do. When I crested that volcano, I was on top of the world. And the view at sunrise was God’s gift to me for trusting him with my journey. 

“Let the love you feel in that memory wash over you and then try bending the spoon again,” she told us. 

The room erupted with oohs and ahhhs as people expressed their excitement over accomplishing what once felt impossible.

I tried. Nothing. I couldn’t do it. 

For hours I kept trying to bend the damn spoon. Still nothing. With each attempt I became more frustrated. More discouraged. I gave up, put the spoon in my purse and proceeded to enjoy my weekend. 

Upon arrival home in Oklahoma City, I made my way to my car and drove toward the exit of the airport parking garage. I reached into my purse to get some money and felt the spoon. I pulled it out, along with my cash, and placed it on my passenger seat. 

As I drove home, a song came on the radio that brought me to tears. Music has a way of doing that for me. I can’t recall the song, but I do remember they lyrics spoke of the divine love God has for each of us. 

Through my tears, I realized what a gift the weekend had been. I’d experienced his love over and over again through the women I met and the experiences we shared as I honed my coaching craft. 

I felt surrounded by his love right there on my drive. 

With one hand on the steering wheel, I reached over and grabbed the hotel cutlery. Singlehandedly, I bent my spoon. 

Love is a powerful force. 

If love has the power to bend metal, imagine what can happen when you love yourself. Fully. Completely. Without judgment or guilt. Without fear or doubt or lack. 

Love for who you are. For how you show up in this world. For the skin you’re in. Love for your family. Friends. Job. Brothers + sisters. 

Imagine a world where everyone loves deeply. 

That world starts with you. Recognizing the power you have in the thoughts you think and the words you speak. Choosing love over hate.

When you show up as love, you encourage the world around you to love a little more. And then a little more. And then a little more. 

One ripple at a time is how we make the oceans rise. 

Finding your way back to love can be challenging. It can feel uncertain and scary, like you don’t know the way. But you do. Sweet friend, you know the way. Simply trust your heart to guide you home.

As a coach, I can give you direction. I can ask all the right questions and give you all the right tools. However, only you can take the necessary steps. 

When you’re ready to take the journey, I’ll be waiting.